Wedding weekend....

It came and went this weekend. The wedding that is. It was a seriously overtiring weekend for me. It all started on Friday morning at 3:00AM, because that’s when I woke up to get showered and drive myself to the aeroporto. Luckily at that time of the morning, the roads are empty my friends, very, very empty, which makes driving down the interstate at 90MPH quite pleasurable. Arriving at the airport, already checked in from the previous afternoon (got to love the internet) I dropped off the bags, cleared security without any warning bells going off, and promptly sat down and waited for the plane to take off. I do like flying for the very simple aspect of airports are a great crossing of cultures and peoples. You can see all types in there, and people watching at an airport can be very entertaining, and dare I say sometimes amusing. You can see it all there. From the guy sporting the rocking mullet, the tattoo that says, “Rock Out with ‘Yer Cock Out”, and the Lynard Skynard t-shirt, to the Buddhist monks I encountered in Manchester NH, it’s all there. I sometimes try to listen to the iPod whilst traveling, but most times I have to take it off because along with the sights I see, I want to hear the sounds. All of this people watching is done under the guise of reading a book. I get through a few pages while sitting in the most uncomfortable chairs in the world, but for the most part, my eyes are darting around checking everyone out. Seeing what that guy is going to do about his screaming and kicking child, listening in to someone’s conversation behind me about how wasted they got the night before, and of course giving the stink eye to the little kid kicking my chair. But to get to see all of this “humanity” I had to get up at 3:00AM, and that’s never a good thing.

Fast forward a few hours, Manchester NH. Arrive, go to the baggage claim, dodge the gigantic line at Dunkin’ Donuts (this is New England, Dunkin’ Donuts is HUGE), and wait for the very small bag that I packed for this weekend to come rolling around on the baggage claim. I get to the claim area, and I see the other folks who were on my flight with me, and I see the sign above the conveyor that says that this is my flight, and the baggage coming from it, but there doesn’t seem to be too many bags coming around. I wait for a few minutes, thinking, well, we did just get off of the plane, but then, the conveyor goes silent, which is never a good thing. The light goes off, and everything stops moving. Oops, looks like by bag didn’t get on the plane with me in New York. What the hell?? It’s not like I had a short layover there or something, but alas, when I need it the most, my bag has gone missing temporarily I hope. If it doesn’t show up, I’ll be attending the wedding in a slightly smelly pair of cargo shorts, and a “Get Your War On” t-shirt (also slightly smelly). I hate it when that happens.

Since my younger brother now lives in Alton, New Hampshire, he was the logical choice to come and pick me up, made even more logical by the mere fact that I would be staying at his house over this short weekend trip. He rolls in, I jump in the car, and we’re off. Off on a mission to find a yellow tie, and a pair of pants for him for this weekend’s festivities. Good thing JC Penny is having a sale. Bear in mind, it’s only about 9:45AM or so in the morning, I’ve gotten almost an entire day out of this trip already, since I’ve been up since 3:00AM. We arrive at the mall only to find that indeed, the stores don’t open until 10:00AM. What the hell? Since when do the stores at the mall open at 10:00AM?? What kind of business are these people running over there? I’ll never know. So like a couple of complete losers, we stand in front of the JC Penny storefront for 15 minutes, and feel like we should be walking laps up and down the length of the mall with the geriatrics who have probably been doing laps since about the time I got up that morning. I feel really out of place since I don’t have a sweatband around my head, and a bad warm-up suit straight out of the early 80’s on as attire. Oh, and squeaky shoes, those are a must, squeaky shoes.

I didn’t know how tough it actually was to find a tie that was yellow. We found one, went to the register, and this particular piece of clothing had been on the $17 table in the back of the men’s department. But when we were walking up to check out, we saw the same tie on the “regular” table, meaning, it was most likely going to be $30. Sure enough, we have the cranky old woman at the register scan it in, $28.50. Hey, I see what’s going on here. A little false advertising with the placement of the ties. You get to the register, they ring you up, counting on the laziness of the average American, they’re thinking you won’t go back to the ties to get something more affordable, and you’ll swallow the extra cost. Not so in this case. We ditch the expensive tie, and find a more appropriate one in the 70% rack. A much better deal right there, much better indeed.

The pre wedding barbeque and or cookout, or gathering you might want to call it was Friday night. So we roll over there after my parents arrive. Things get started over there at around 6:00PM or so, and by the time I get there, I’m already toasted, and tired. Food comes out around 8:00PM. I get some chow, and am relieved to see that within the beer selections that we have for the night, we have about a case of Hoegarden, one of my personal favorites. I’m starting to think that the trip that Lee took to Belgium a couple of years ago is paying dividends. Once a devout Budweiser drinker, he seems to have come around to the good beer selection, well done Lee, well done. After everyone devours food and beverages, and it’s dark outside, karaoke starts up. Oh God, karaoke. It’s a possible nightmare situation for me, as karaoke kind of makes me shiver. It’s fun to see people make silly fools of themselves though, so I can take watching it, but when the call goes up from the “stage” for me to go up there, there is no way in H-E double hockey sticks I’m rolling like that this evening. I’m not drunk enough, and I’m tired enough at this point in time to be getting very grumpy. So I plant myself into a lawn chair with the other grumpies at the party. There’s myself, Uncle Bill, Doug F-R, Joel, and Jay. We have good discussions amongst ourselves, and we are determined that this is the best place to be for now, and to avoid the singing carnage going on all around us, and filling the local neighborhood with caterwauling not seen since the days of Celine Dion. The only problem with staying at Joel’s place is that it’s a 45 minute drive from where we currently are (backyard karaoke bar) to his house. It’s now approaching somewhere past 10:00PM, time to fly home I think. We roll out of there, convoy style. I’m riding shotgun with Joel, Melissa is riding with my parents to prevent them from getting freaked out because they’re driving in a weird place at night and don’t know where they are, and Kelly and Doug and bringing up the rear in the Mystery Machine (also known as Doug’s VW Vanagon, but calling it the Mystery Machine is much funnier I think you’ll agree). Joel knows the backways, so we’re able to make it back in under an hour, which is good, because this dog is tired and barking.

Bed set-up takes little or no time at all. The AeroBed, yeah, sounds silly, but those things are comfy. I’d recommend one of those for every house without a doubt. If you think you’re going to have some company at some point in time, get yourself one of those. It’s worth the cost I think. Finally, finally I get to lay down and rest my head. It’s about 12:30AM now on Saturday. 22.5 hours or so since I awoke to start this trek. And, my mother wants to just talk. Which normally, I’m not going to have a problem with, but I’m just not feeling it right now, and I crash heavily. I’m awoken a short time later as Joel and Melissa’s cat pounces on my head in the middle of the night, because he’s been sleeping all day, and with a house full of people, he wants to play now. This head pouncing continues for about 30 minutes, and he finally decides, I think Tom doesn’t want to play so much, and moves off to probably go and annoy Doug and Kelly, or Joel and Melissa, which doesn’t bother me because now I’m not getting sharp claws piercing through my scalp at the dark hours of the early morning. Wake up time comes courtesy of my parents, because they’ve been getting up at like 5AM for the past 40 some odd years, and why let a little thing like needing some sleep get in the way this time. Although I think they did hold up until about 6:30AM, but then they needed to be up, and my mother has a hard time being quiet, so there is noisy coffee making going on, and stumbling around the kitchen, I might as well get up, everyone else is going to be doing so soon anyway, might as well be one of the gang. Couple this lack of sleep this evening, with the lack of sleep the previous evening, and throw in the case of raging insomnia I had last week, and oh, I’m in sleep debt by about a million hours, eh, what’s a few more then?

Joel and Melissa’s new house sits near several small lakes and or ponds, and one big ass lake in New Hampshire. They have some free beach access because of the home owner’s association that they now belong to, and this is good. The weather is nice, slight breeze, sunny, blue skies, and the pond water is warm and inviting. I had a shorts malfunction in the meantime. I got the leg of my swim trunks caught on my knee when I was trying to jump up on the jet ski, and of course they split right up the middle of the crotch. This is not a good look for me. Now I’ve got to un-hook the trailer, bring the car back to the house, change shorts, and then get back to the beach. The water in the pond is nice though, good to take a little swim in whilst waiting for my turn on the old jet ski. Jet skiing is fun though, although for short amounts of time of course. It’s also fun to see your Mom try to drive it. She did OK, but was what we would call a little cautious on the old throttle, which is to say, she didn’t gun it. Which is, in my opinion, the main reason you get one of these machines, so you can run it full throttle down the water. It’s fun, it’s exhilarating, and I figured out after watching my brother how to cut sharp turns, put the bow under the water, and shoot up a good rooster tail while whipping it around. Good stuff.

Wedding time. Wedding ceremony is supposed to start at 6:00PM. Starts more around 6:30ish. It’s a nice and short wedding ceremony though. A couple of readings, some vows, some tears, and it’s over and done with. Badda boom, badda bing. The bar, open. Well, at least there is some free beer up for grabs, but I resist for the most part, mostly because I’m STILL tired, and kind of empty stomached, which means, I’ll get hammered off of one beer if I go in for the kill now. I’m thinking that the food will be presented any time now… No, really… Any time now… It was awhile before the salads were served for the reception, a long time, but there were some appetizers of course. I think Lee and Jeannie were getting pictures done around various locations of the golf course at which they were married at, so it is acceptable. By the time the food was served, and we got some, and ate it, and finished eating it, it was 9:30PM. 3 hours of time has elapsed since ceremony, and eating. Ouch… By this time though, my moratorium on drinking had disappeared and 2 16OZ gin and tonics had been consumed, with another one on deck. They were pouring them pretty heavy, and hell, it’s good gin, might as well take advantage of $3 drinks while I can. Around 10:00PM though, my patience has worn thin, I’m tired, and wanting to get some rest, and I’m getting cranky as all get out. I’m hiding it well for the most part though. We say our goodbyes, and leave the wedding site, and head homeward. Once again, it’s about an hour or so from where we’re at. Inflate my bed, and get to sleep around 1:00AM again. Wake up time, 4:00AM to get to the airport in time to make my plane. Joel and Melissa roll in around 1:30 or so, I wake up when they come in, and then the cat wants to play some more, so realistically, I get about 2 hours of solid sleep.

Flying from Manchester to Charlotte was nice, very nice. I got to sit in the exit row, by myself, for the length of the flight. I could stretch out, kick back, relax, read, and make the time go by nice and fast. And oh, if you really want to read a good depressing book, read Bastard Out of Carolina. It’s good, but oh so sad and depressing. But read it. It’s worth it I think. Now, getting into Charlotte, it sucks, because I have about a 2+hour layover. Which if I had a car there, I could be just about home in 2 hours of driving, but I don’t, so I sit. There is annoying kid across from me flipping a yo-yo around, and he almost catches me in the face with it. If that had happened, I would expect him to get an ass kicking from me, or at least from his Dad, but his Dad, didn’t look like the ass kicking type. I just kind of shot a glance over to him as if to say, “Knock the shit off buddy, or your kid is going to come up really short.” He understands the look, and takes said yo-yo away from the kid, and makes him have a seat and settle down, or lets him go off to run around the area near the gate. If we’re lucky, he’ll fall off the jetway and break something. The trip from Charlotte to RDU was packed full up tight. I had a seat hogger sitting next to me of course. Kid with a laptop and taking up both armrests. That’s just bullshit. So there I was, in the last row of the plane, no recline ability, and this jackass is taking up all of the room. I’m rolled up into the bulkhead of the plane, trying to read, while this guy is allowing no armrest space, and he’s got his bag on the floor, creeping into my space as well, and he’s not trying to take up less space, oh, he’s trying to take up more. I suck it up though, and decide, hell, it’s only a short flight from here to RDU, I can handle this, I can handle this. I know, I’ll just read my new book, and get through it. I did. Arrival at RDU, I did get my bag delivered this time with the proper flight this time. I hightail it out of there, find the Silver Bullet, and roll out of the parking deck. Of course, I get behind the worst soccer mom minivan driver in the world. Just my luck.

Over all, the weekend, was good. Not so bad. Just tiring. I wasn’t able to take full advantage of the weekend due to being ex-freakin’-hausted the entire time I was there. I’ll plan better next time I think. I did get home, and was able to spend some time with the SO, getting some lunch, watching a biography on Evel Knievel, watching another show on Satan, and then checking out the new show on Discovery Channel Miami Ink (about a tattoo shop on South Beach). Early to bed, and damn, it was hard getting up out of the warm bed this morning. I’m thinking maybe someday this year, I’ll catch up on some sleep.